To the Single Girl

To the single girl,

You have your dreams. You have your desires.
You pray for God to bring “the one.”
You keep waiting for the day you’ll meet “that one.”
Yet years pass by and still you here are – more single then ever.

“Maybe there’s something wrong with me.”
“Maybe I’m too picky.”
“Maybe I’ll never fall in love and maybe I’ll never get married.”

Thoughts, thoughts, and more thoughts. Ah but this is where you get hung up about something that was never supposed to consume your entire life. This is the point where a desire can become a bondage.

Marriage isn’t the end all and be all.
It isn’t the only thing that will make you happy and complete.
The problem is that too many girls get caught up in that fairytale.
Fairytales cause you to become dissatisfied in something that was never even intended to satisfy you.

Hate to break it to you, but there is more to life than flowers and fairytales.
There is more to life than nice feelings and “relationship goals.”
There is more to life than just your future boyfriend or future husband.

See, what you need to realize is this:
You don’t need a man to make you feel worthy, loved, and beautiful.
You don’t need a man to give you attention and you don’t need a man to determine your value.
God has already done that.
So you don’t need to date around.
And really, you don’t need to get married.

What you do need to do is work on being satisfied with where you are in life right now. How? Well for starters, you need to realize that a man will never be able to complete you. And until you realize that, you will never be satisfied.

The truth is that God and God alone can complete you.
Too many girls have not found their completeness in Christ.
And that is why they are constantly seeking for attention and endlessly jumping from guy to guy. But they are only chasing the wind and finding heartbreak.
The reality is that no man will ever truly satisfy you.
Yes, it is natural to desire a relationship. It is natural to desire marriage.
It is God’s design. And it is good.
But until you find your completeness in Christ, you will not be able to thrive in any relationship, much less marriage.

So maybe what you see as singleness is actually growth.
Maybe what you see as singleness is actually preparation.
Maybe what you see as singleness is actually God’s way of saying, “I’m saving you from heartbreak.”

Before you can enter into marriage with a man and “become one” with him, you need to know what it means to become one with God.
You need to know what it means to be secure with God alone,
complete with God alone,
and loved by Christ alone.

There is a lot to learn. But this is what the waiting season is for.
There is much to be learned in the waiting.
There is much to be learned in singleness.
So embrace your singleness and learn from the waiting.
And instead of letting yourself become consumed in dreams of “the future one,” take this time in your life to work on your own life, your own ministry, and you own walk with God.

When the time is right, God will allow the right man to step into your life and help you build what you have already started; and you, him.
You don’t even need to look.
Just wait.
It’s better to wait for a man than settle for a boy.

And if you don’t get married, guess what? It’s not the end of the world.
You can live just as satisfied and feel just as loved, worthy, and complete knowing that God still has a plan and a purpose for your life. It might look like a different plan than your friends’ lives, but His purpose remains the same. Just learn to be satisfied in Christ and you’ll be satisfied in any season you are in – regardless of your relationship status.

To the single girl…

It’s not even about the waiting. It’s about being satisfied.
In your satisfaction, God will give you the patience to wait.
So be satisfied. Right here, right now –
In Christ, and Christ alone.
He is enough. Always has been, always will be.

“For He satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul He fills with good things.”
Psalm 107:9